


After the darkness

by Nightlark100



Category: Antisepticeye - Fandom, Darkiplier - Fandom
Genre: Darkness, Demonic Possession, Demons, Kidnapping, Multi, Suicide Attempt, Unhealthy Relationships
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-28
Updated: 2018-11-02
Packaged: 2019-08-08 23:30:11
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,700
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16438910
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nightlark100/pseuds/Nightlark100
Summary: "What will you do when the light flees from this world? When hope is extinguished and all around is shadow?""Learn to see in the dark"





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> My first Ao3 story and also my first story featuring the deliciously dark duo Antisepticeye and Darkiplier.  
> This is probably going to be a slow burner of a story so please be patient ^_^ It will probably also feature some very nasty stuff. I'll post trigger warnings at the start of each chapter.
> 
> Preface - Short. Suicide

I always thought the term heartbreak was stupid growing up. Then again I’d always been fairly cynical of the concept of love in general. The boys my age were just so immature. Throughout my childhood and teen years I steered clear, preferring the company of books, the fictional men that inhabited the pages were just… better. More.

When I left for university, I had no plans to change my ways and intended to focus on my degree. I wasn’t interested in drinking and nightclubs were my personal hell. I wanted to get through the three years, get a decent job and maybe then I’d find the right man.

Things didn’t go to plan. Luka derailed them.

We met at orientation on our first day of university. He was studying music, I was studying humanities. He was different from the people I’d met before. He was intelligent and charming and… too good to be true. We dated through first year and into our second. He was the first boy to make me feel beautiful. And he was also the first boy to break my heart.

Sitting at my desk in my tiny dorm room, I looked at the packet of pills. I wasn’t so melodramatic that I’d kill myself because a boy hurt my feelings. Luka had merely set things in motion and they’d been going downhill ever since. I’d suffered from depressed episodes before and it had taken me a long time to overcome them. Now, I just didn’t have the strength anymore.

I wasn’t delusional. In my head I’d played it over ever since I’d considered this as an option and I could romanticise it all I wanted but I knew the reality. There was no graceful way to exit this world. I would settle for the least painful.

**_Take the pills._ **

_Maybe it’ll be like falling asleep._

Maybe not…

 _what have you got to lose?_ _After all, you wouldn’t be at this point if you had anything left._

I folded up my letter and placed it in an envelope. I didn’t really have many friends on campus. I knew that my flatmates wouldn’t notice anything for a few days. Who was I leaving the note for? It just felt like the done thing. I picked up the pills, my hands trembling. Could I do this? The doubts were gnawing at my brain and surely that was enough… enough to stop me and at least delay this until I’d given it more thought.

I decided to take a shower to calm myself down. The shower was where I did my thinking. There was something inherently comforting about the feel of warm water running over my skin. I traced the droplets with my fingertips, gliding over the ridges and valleys of my arms.

My razor was tucked between a bottle of shampoo and shower gel, barely visible. The edge was stained a dull bronze and glimmered in an almost hypnotic way.

I picked up the blade and turned it over between my fingers. Within the depths of the metal I thought I saw a glimpse of colour, a flash of green.

_One act. One cut._

It would hurt but I was no stranger to pain.

_**Do it.** _

The dark words were almost audible, something separate from my own thoughts and far more powerful, more persuasive. My head felt foggy and I was barely aware of my own actions.

_**Do it… come to us…** _

_Let go of the pain and the fear… Be free._

 

 

I felt the sharp sting as metal broke through skin. I watched numbly as the blood dripped down my arm and mingled with the running water. I don’t want this… The thought was new and quiet and hidden. And it had come too late. I heard laughter, who’s I didn’t know. My head seemed to take on an uncomfortable weight and my legs fell beneath me. I lay beneath the shower, watching with unfocused eyes as my life ran down the drain and on the edge of my vision, for just a moment, I saw a pair of smart black shoes standing a few feet from me. But then the world collapsed in on itself and the darkness swallowed me.


	2. Sunrise and emeralds

The door swung open to reveal a darkened room, let only by candle light. I inched forward hesitantly. The moment I crossed the threshold, the door shut with a sharp click, the sound reverberating around the room.

In the limited light, I could make out a table set for a meal but I couldn’t distinguish anything else about the surroundings. Two chairs were placed at opposite ends of the table, facing one another. From somewhere nearby I was aware of the faint sound of music, a soft lilting sound that rose and ebbed as I tried to make it out more clearly.

On the table, the candles flickered and nearly went out, stirred by an unseen wind. The sound of footsteps, loud and clear but with no obvious source, found my ears and I stumbled backwards. I wasn’t sure why but the very sound seemed to awaken something inside the pit of my stomach. A sense of déjà vu almost, a knowledge of something dreaded to come.

**_Have a seat._ **

From out of the darkness, a baritone voice that seemed almost like multiple voices speaking at once, spoke. When I didn’t move, there came a low sigh. The chair nearest me pulled back sharply, the legs scraping against the floor.

**_I said sit…_ **

The air had grown colder and I could feel goosebumps rising along my arms. After a moment’s hesitation, I took the seat offered but kept my muscles tensed, ready to leap up and run.

**_That’s better._ **

A man was sitting opposite me. I hadn’t seen him sit down but suddenly he was there, like he had always been. He was dressed in a suit, a crisp white shirt underneath a tailored jacket, and had dark hair, loose strands hanging slightly over his eyes which were rimmed with shadows. His skin was washed out, almost grey… but that had to be because of the light. There was something… off and it took me a moment to work out what it was. As I looked, the air around the man distorted and I got a brief impression of his shape overlapping the real figure. It was like watching a 3-d movie without the glasses, two fuzzy images laid over one another.

**_Perhaps I should apologise for keeping you waiting. But then again, I’ve been expecting you here for some time._ **

“W…where am I?”

**_Patience. Answers will come in time. But here you belong to me and I intend not to squander our time together on such trivialities._ **

He reached out and lifted a glass from in front of him, the elegant crystal full of some indeterminable dark fluid.

**_Drink?_ **

“I’m not thirsty,” I said softly. My wrist itched and I rubbed it under the table. The skin felt damp and I swore that there were droplets of moisture under the tip of my fingers.

**_You really should learn to be less… difficult. We’re going to be spending a lot of time together._ **

“You gave me a choice. You should learn to respect my decisions.”

There was a pause and then he let out a humourless, clipped laugh.

**_Maybe in future I just won’t allow you the luxury of choice._ **

He pushed the glass towards me, his fingers seeming to fade in and out of focus even as they touched the object. His eyes bored into me, making my breath hitch in my throat. My arm lifted of its own accord and reached out, clasping around the glass. His fingers grazed against mine and I couldn’t help the gasp that escape my lips. Touching him was like putting my hand in a bucket of ice and I jerked backwards instinctively, the dark liquid crashing against the sides of the glass and cascading onto the tablecloth.

**_Well now, that was unfortunate._ **

My eyes were fixated on the stain, watching as it slowly spread over the cloth. There was something familiar and unsettling about the sight. The itch on my wrist and the sensation of moisture grew more persistence. I turned my arm over to expose my palm and inside of my wrist. The skin was coated in a layer of dried blood that as I watched began to liquefy and run down my fingers onto the table.

**_It seems our time is up._ **

 

* * *

* * *

 

 

I opened my eyes and stared up at the ceiling. Day 41. 3am. Bedroom. I repeated the words softly under my breath, taking the time to ground myself. I sat up slowly, casting my eyes around my darkened bedroom, automatically reaching out to the bedside table to grab my phone. There was a text message from my mum, still adjusting to the time difference despite my frequent reminders.

After my… accident, I’d had to leave university for a while. And when the time came that I wanted to return, or at least couldn’t take anymore of being at home treated like an invalid, I decided to apply for the student exchange. I rationalised it as a chance to return to the educational environment without having to deal with the memories attached to my former school. Of course, moving overseas probably wasn’t what most people had in mind when I suggested it but… I needed a fresh start. The thought of going back to those buildings, the dorms, places that held familiarity and meaning to me, turned my stomach inside out. This was better.

I got up and grabbed some clothes from a box stacked haphazardly. 41 days and I still hadn’t even started unpacking. I’m sure my therapist would have a field day with that.

I dressed in my running gear and let myself out, moving silently through the shared apartment to the front door. The 3am wake ups had become a common reoccurrence, as had the dreams. I could never remember what they were about afterwards; I just woke up with a sense of unease in the pit of my stomach and skin that was almost numb with cold, no matter how many layers I put on. I had taken to going for early morning runs before hunkering down with a good book while waiting for the sunrise. That was one thing I liked about this place. Back home had been all buildings, endless stretches of grey concrete. Here there were trees, parks, even mountains nearby.

As I stepped out of the front door, I was hit by a blast of icy air. My breath frosted in front of my face and hung in the darkness before dissipating. Too cold for my usual habits. The run would keep me warm but I knew I wouldn’t be able to sit around for very long. There was frost on the grass and a sharp biting wind. It was amazing how quickly the weather had turned. I set off, starting with a slow jog before speeding up as I took my usual route to a nearby park, looping round the perimeter a few times.

A luminous neon display caught my eye, dizzyingly bright in the darkness. A twenty four hour coffee shop, a small independent place with hand drawn posters in the windows. I’d passed it plenty of times before but the sign was rarely illuminated. In the early hours it shined out to me, drawing me in like a beacon. I slowed my pace and diverted from the path, heading in. The shop was charming, full of mismatched furniture that gave it a warm cosy feeling. The walls were papered with pictures, book illustrations. It was largely empty inside, as was to be expected at 3am. There were two customers, more than I expected, and a young woman perched behind the counter doodling in a notebook.

I ordered a hot chocolate and found a seat in the corner. As I waited for my drink, I let my eyes roam. There was a mirror hanging on the wall nearby, with a mosaic style frame and I caught sight of my reflection. I’d changed over the past few years. My hair was cobweb fine and limp, my skin which had always been pale was like unearthly porcelain even with the colour brought on by the wind.

There was a movement behind my head and I lifted my eyes. For a moment I saw the shape of a figure and got the impression of vivid green. When I turned to look, there was no one there.

I sighed and settled back in my chair, closing my eyes.

_You’re seeing things again._

No I’m not.

_And now you’re arguing with yourself._

Shut up

_Your doctor would have a field day with this…_

I said shut up.

_Well if you were still seeing him that is… or if you ever told him the truth to begin with._

Oh fuck you.

“Excuse me?”

For a moment I didn’t realise the voice was real and not just in my head. They merged into one, a soft lilting tone that was strangely melodic.

“Excuse me?” The voice repeated.

I opened my eyes, startled. A young man was stood in front of me. He was wearing a grey hoodie, damp at the edges and a beanie, ruffled brown hair poking out at the edges. His eyes were a startling shade of blue, wide and clear like pools of water.

“I… sorry, I was in a world of my own…” He gave me a bright smile.

“It’s okay. I have to say, I’m surprised to see another brit here.”

“You’re from Ireland?”

“What gave me away?” he laughed softly. “Do you mind if I join you?”

I hesitated for a moment before nodding slowly. He pulled up a chair and sat down, tugging off his hat. Droplets of water ran down his forehead as he brushed his hair backwards.

“Is it raining?”

“Snowing. Came out of nowhere. I was heading home from a friend’s house; if I’d known I would have stayed over.” He shrugged off his jacket and hung it over the back of the chair. “I’m Jack. Nice to meet you.”

“You too. I’m Alice. Are you a student?”

“No, I came over for a convention and to visit some of my friends in the area. You?”

“I’m doing a year abroad. Studying mythology and folklore.”

_And running from your problems._

No I’m not, I just needed a fresh start.

_Liar_

**_Leave her be. She already knows everything you say to her._ **

I was so caught up in my internal monologue, the warring voices that had been disturbing my mind since that night and perhaps even before then, that I didn’t realise Jack had been talking the whole time. I forced myself to concentrate as he continued to chatter happily.

There was something relaxing about his presence. An aura of warmth that radiated off of him and although I struggled at first, I found him surprisingly easy to talk to. I sipped my hot chocolate, doing more listening than actual talking.

Through the window, the sky began to lighten and the first rays of the sun peaked over the horizon. Jack suppressed a yawn and glanced at his phone.

“Wow we’ve been here for a few hours… I should really get some sleep…” He stood up but paused, looking back at me. “Would you mind… maybe hanging out again sometime? I’m here for a while longer and if you’re here for a whole year, I could introduce you to some of my friends?”

I was slightly taken aback by his forwardness and my wariness began to rear its head once more.

_Come on, what’s the worst than can happen?_

“Sure. I’d like that,” I said shyly. He took my phone and keyed in his number, giving me a bright smile before turning and heading back out into the cold.

As I watched, I caught sight of that flash of green in the mirror again and when I glanced over, I was left with the image of an eye burned into the back of my retina, emerald green with a core of blackest coal.


End file.
